About Me

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Jacksonville, Florida, United States
I am a smart mouthed, tell it like it is southern chick. I love and hurt like everyone else. Take me as I am or get on outta here! I have two wonderful children, One large man child husband, and two furbabies. I'm existing, hopefully soon to be living once the brain tumor I have is removed. Anything you want to know, e-mail me!

Sunday, July 31, 2011

Routines, weight loss...and questions....

So, I am guessing because my metabloism has increased with being pregnant that I must not be consuming the correct amount of calories, as In about 3 weeks I've lost 6+ pounds. It's not that I'm trying to do so, but I'm just not that hungry to begin with, or it's that I get full easy. Before this I trained my body to only consume certain amounts of food, and certain types. I barely ate carbs, basically sticking just to lean, grilled or broiled meats and stacking up on vegetables, and trying to maintain reasonable portion sizes. It worked for me. Now that I'm pregnant, I seem not to want much of any kind of meat (get your head out of the gutter if it's in there) and I am loving the vegetables even more. Those and AppleJacks cereal. OMG...yum. So...do I just let this ride or do I attempt to stretch my stomach to take in more food? And try to eat more carbs in the process...??

The routine of things is finally starting to kick in to where I no longer need to look at my calendar to see what meds I need to take when. I finally have it down without looking, as I need to since I'm going to be doing this for the next 6 weeks.

5 a.m.
2 Estrace pills- orally
2 Progesterone Capsules- Vaginally

8 a.m.
1 cc Shot of PIO
1 prenatal vitamin
1 81mg Aspirin

10 p.m.
2 Estrace pills- orally
2 Progesterone Capsules- Vaginally


It's good to have it down to the exact hour, that way I am getting the meds the same time every day. Also, by taking the Estrace so late at night, I don't wake up with hot flashes as I did before taking it a 7 p.m. Those things SUCK!

Another thing that happened over this past week was my Mom getting diagnosed with lung cancer. She goes in Monday (tomorrow) for a PET Scan to determine if it has spread anywhere else, what type of radiation and how many days a week she will need it.
I have taken the week to think about this and let it sink in, and I have come to terms with the fact that it's not going to change her Dx from me being upset. All I can do is hope she doesn't follow her Mothers path and be gone in 9 months as my grandmother did after her diagnosis.

My ultrasound to see a heartbeat and if one or both embies stuck is in a week. I'm hoping next week flies by so we can hurry up and get to it. I don't feel pregnant as I never did with my kids, but this is much different. It wasn't IVF, so I knew they were sticking around. No bleeding or cramping going on, just no further symptoms. All I feel is a little more hungry, got these twinges still, a little more gas and some heartburn. No biggy.

Oh well. Thanks for reading!

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Final two betas....

So, I know I haven't posted since Friday after the first beta, but I didn't (and still don't) feel like writing a huge blog. The past couple days have brought on some nausea, not bad, but enough to make me not want to do squat.

Anyway...here is the final tally on the betas for this journey-
9dp5dt- 191

(for those who don't know the abbreviations- 9 days past 5 day transfer and so on with the # change)

Those are excellent numbers and doubling like they are supposed to, 48-72 hours.

So my ultrasound is Aug. 8th sometime in the afternoon.

I will update that day or the next depending on how late we are in Tampa and all that.

Thanks for reading!

Friday, July 22, 2011

Beta, Oh rotten beta...

Well, I posted on the surro site and on FB, but I must do it here too, so I can continue to chronicle this journey and look back on this blog when it's all over and say, whatever it is I will say when that time comes...

My las 2 journies, I never got a positive pee stick, so I knew beta was negative. My pee sticks are still darkening by the day, so I knew this was, good, but I didn't think I was going to get lucky enough to get a good strong beta. I thought I'd wind up with 55 or something. The NC said anything above 5 is considered positive, but anything over 50 is better. My beta came back at 191. Now, this is really good news to me considering it's not ZERO. LOL

However, we read into these beta's and look for signs of how many babies are in there with no luck as there are so many differences in how we produce this hormone. So, we get a few beta's and hope they double to show a viable pregnancy and then wait for an ultrasound to see how many are baking in there.

IVF is a roller coaster ride for everyone involved. Once you're over one hurdle, the next is staring you in the face. You get the Doctor, the Medical Screening, The Meds, The Transfer, The 2WW for a positive pregnancy test/beta and then you wait for two more betas to rise correctly and then you wait for ultrasound for heart beat, then next ultrasound to make sure everything is still ok, and on and on and on. It's like I will never fully relax until I pass the 24 week mark where a baby is viable.

Anyway, that's all my rambling for the day on the surrogacy front. Tomorrow is my birthday and I have every intention of relaxing and enjoying turning 30.

Until Monday when I have my next beta....

Thanks for Reading!

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Seeing the word- Pregnant.

So, Thomas wanted to see the word pregnant. We went to wal-mart and got a 2 pack, just in case my hcg wasn't high enough to show it today. Well, I took it this afternoon, and low and behold, there it is.
I've been reading the HCG has to be at a level of 50mIU/mL of the hormone. All the information you want to know on home pregnancy tests can be found here.
Some other surros have taken a pregnancy test the day of beta and checked out dark the test line (the other line that shows up on every test pregnant or not is the control line) in accordance with their beta number. For those who don't know what a "beta" test is- The hormone you pee out that makes the stick tell you that you're pregnant is HCG or  human chorionic gonadotropin . It is also secreted in the blood and that is the beta level, is the amount of hCG in a womans system when we get a positive pregnancy test. For IVF patients, such as myself and other women, a beta blood test is pretty routine regardless if you get a positive pregnancy test before hand. My first beta blood test this cycle is Thursday, 7/21. Reproductive Endocrinologists (the nifty test tube Doctors performing miracles) get a 2nd and sometimes 3rd beta level after a positive first one to make sure they are rising correctly.

So, I probably will not post another blog until after my beta comes in Thursday. It's Sunday and I'm still in shock of being pregnant after this year long struggle, and honestly I've already given in to the extreme tiredness. Just last week I was taking an hour to fall asleep and now as soon as I hit the pillow I'm out. It's an exhausting, fun, & rewarding ride.

Thanks for reading...

Saturday, July 16, 2011

I'm itching to tell...

I don't know how many of you know that this is my 3rd go round at IVF and my 3rd set of Intended Parents, but now you do. I started the initial process of getting matched and tested in June 2010. So, we are just over a year from my first contact with an agency, and I am finally, finally pregnant. It's taken 3 transfers and a year of time to get where I am.
I had transfer 7/11, you can see that blog post here.
Anyway, I had a few tests last night so faint you had to tilt and squint to see, but at 12:30 this afternoon, I got a line you can see without any squinting or tilting. I am ecstatic and my IP's just happen to be coming over, and I text IM and let her know I had a surprise for her. I'm sure she knows what it is, but at least she has hope now, since her last surro screwed her so badly.

If you have "surro" eyes you can see this, or if you know what you're looking for, this should pop right out at you. My camera stinks, so the pic stinks, but it is defintely positive!

To be honest, I feel incredible as I thought I would, since I did with my other two pregnancies as well. The only complaint I have at the moment is I am not wanting to see anything chocolate, which I normally love.
Oh well, that's the price you pay!!
I'm very excited I get to tell L & T they are going to be parents again. I just hope the line continues to darken as the days go by. My beta's are scheduled for the 21st, 25th and 27th. So damn exciting. Oh, and I will be 30 next Saturday the 23rd, so I am defintely going to my favorite resturant, just incase I wind up with morning sickness.
I am on cloud nine!! Ahh! *Big Grin*

Thanks for reading!

Thursday, July 14, 2011

Transfer went great!!

So....the flight to Ft. Lauderdale/Miami wasn't too bad, it was packed since Mondays are a busy travel day and all, and it's an inexpensive airline to begin with. Anyway, my daughter and I got there safe and sound. It was an early flight, so we didn't eat breakfast, we wound up having brunch around 11 a.m. at a local diner near my IP's home and it was soooo good!! After that we went to their (gorgeous) house and unpacked and relaxed for about an hour before my IM and I left for South Miami Clinic, a 45 minute drive in normal traffic down there, which turned into an hour drive because of an accident. On the way there we talked and talked and I drank 2 bottles of water and man I felt like I was going to burst. I swear the worst part about a transfer is having a full bladder, I mean FULL to the hilt. I metabloize (and I'm sure we all do) water VERY quickly and I had to relieve myself to almost empty before transfer. 20 minutes later up in stirrups she put the u/s wand on my belly and my bladder was FULL again. Anyway, she had 3 frozen embies left and two were excellent and the third didn't expand during the thaw, so it was discarded. The two that were put in were fantastic and one was hatching, the other hatched with over 200 cells each. This is the first transfer of the three I've had where I actually saw the eggs land in my uterus via ultrasound. The last two transfers, the Doctor waved the wand over me to see my bladder was full and peek at my uterus and then the machine went off during the transfer. So, this one was totally different in that there was no PGD, they were hatched/ing and I saw them fall from the straw into me. I asked the chance of a pregnancy occuring and she said she would be shocked if I didn't wind up with twins, but she was positive one would stick. I hope only one sticks and so does my IM, but she said god only gives people what they can handle, so she'll take whatever she gets. Now, just before transfer, my husband, Thomas text me that he got employee of the month at work and a $150 bonus check. Hellz yeah! But it didn't stop there. After transfer he bought a scratch off lotto ticket and won $100 on it!!! What?! So, that told me that since we had some good luck that day, it must be fate! Anyway transfer went great and I will probably start POAS Saturday. My IP's are coming to visit me Saturday since they have to drive here to do a video interview for our agency. My plan is to pee that morning and hopefully have a BFP, but I plan to do it again after they get here, hopefully I can walk out of the bathroom with a double lined test for them!!

Another nice thing is I got to taste a Cuban dish since my IM is cuban. Can I just say, YUM! Both my IP's took wonderful care and were extremely hospitable to my daughter and I the entire time. On Wednesday morning (my last full day there) IM and I sat and had a 2 hour conversation in her kitchen about nearly everything, including the last surrogate she had who basically dooped her. My IP's do have a child together, and my IM has children from her first marriage, but can't carry now due to Hypertension. The child they have is from her first surrogate, the same clinic got her pregnant the first try. Everything went beautifully with that one. Then they tried again and the surrogate lost their baby at 4 months gestation. It's very personal what happened, but it was not anything to do with my IP's embryo's, they had the fetus tested. That surrogate also got pregnant the first time. 1st surro had 3 embies transferred to her, 2nd surro had 2 transferred. So, I am hopeful this the time it will happen for us. *fingers crossed*

Anyway, I am exhausted as I didn't sleep much while I was there. I never sleep well unless I am home in my bed. I will say, the hormones really haven't gotten to me much this cycle, until this morning. We had an extremely early flight home and I was up at 4 a.m. (after being in and out of sleep for about 4 hours, which is how I slept all three nights I was there) so add in tired beyond all get out, and when the plane touched down in Tampa at 8 a.m., I was freaking crying! Yes, crying. I've never been happier to be home. I missed my son and my husband, and though it's odd, my 2 dogs, baby raccoon, snakes and even the fat cat who lazes around my house.

Oh! I almost forgot! I got a call from my school on Wednesday to congratulate me on having a 3.75 GPA! It's one of the highest in the school and they are so happy I am doing well. Nine "A's" and four "B's" so far, with four classes left before graduation...I'm thinking I will be shooting for that 4.0 if I can do it!!

So anyway, I think I'm done rambling. I wanted to add in a few pictures of the trip....nothing much. Thanks for reading!!

                                          This is this morning's flight...ahh...sunrise from an airplane!
The next one is the sunrise on the Sunshine Skyway bridge from Bradenton to St. Pete.

Next is my DD, first time on a plane, headed to Ft. Lauderdale!

And finally, this is the cuban dish. No idea what it's called. It has white rice, boiled potates, tomatoe sauce and cubed beef w/ some spices. Also half a fried plantain. Yum!

I'll probably post Saturday or Sunday and let everyone know my BFP or BFN status as of then. :)

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Yup, it moved up...

I got an e-mail from my coordinator yesterday morning changing the transfer from Tuesday the 12th to Monday the 11th, so everything has to start a day early! It's nice though, all travel arrangements have been made and Evey and I are all packed already actually. We have to be at the airport at 5:30 a.m. Monday morning for our flight that leaves at 7 a.m.

I am excited and nervous all at the same time. I feel like this is the time it's actually going to work. This clinic is HIGHLY recognized as a very successful clinic with high pregnancy rates via IVF.

I started my PIO shots yesterday morning and ouchie. Big ouchie. I don't remember them being this painful, but I'll live. I've got some friends with words of encouragment and the voices of experience helping me through. Honestly, I am so thankful for AAS. I would be lost without it.

Anyway, aside from aggravation at home with my dd being a little glove theif at the hospital and my lazy ass aunt not wanting to help my Mom out in any way, I'm good. Excited. Nervous. Bitchy, LOL Thank you estrogen!

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

What a day!

*NOTE: Mostly Non-Surrogacy Related Post*

So, today has been a mixed emotion day.
I wasn't going to blog again until after transfer, but I feel that I need to get a few things out.
Saturday morning, I woke up to blood in my bed. Talk about freaking out. I'm not pregnant, nor have I transferred yet, but I am supposed to in a week. I thought my lining was shedding and I about had a melt down at first. So, then I passed a clot, which made it worse. Finally a few friends and my dh got me to call the emergency # for the clinic and my RE called me back pretty quickly. She said bleeding at this stage is usually linked to high estrogen levels, so she knocked my dose down from 4 mg a day to 2 mg a day. It's Tuesday and I'm still bleeding lightly. But this morning, I went in for an ultrasound and my lining is a shining 10.7 mm. For those of you who don't know, 7-9 mm is where most RE's want a lining to be for a transfer. So mine is nice and fluffy :) The place I get my b/w done closed early today so I don't have my E2 levels back yet.

Aside from that, which was the good part of today, the damn Casey Anthony trial verdict came back today and I have been fighting people left and right. And it's not even about the verdict itself, but the insults swinging from having different opinions on it. One person I don't know even said all Floridians heads have been fried by the sun, that's why we make such bad decisions. Excuse me?!? Who the hell are YOU? This girl lives in Iowa. Well, let me get to the stereo-typing you just did....I could have called her a few choice words, but that's not me and I don't believe that. My Dad is from Iowa and I've lived there. I know how it is. I also asked her if she wanted to insult Californians while she was on a roll. Why, you ask? Because they aquitted O.J. Simpson who murdered TWO people and they had DNA evidence and he was aquitted. At least with Casey Anthony there was no DNA. Whatever. If you're going to stereo-type people be prepared. I hate it when people do that. A surrogate get's stereo-typed as money hungry or some other name I choose not to say for "giving up her baby", even though it's never OUR baby to "give up" to it's rightful parents.
Some people are just too damn stupid for their own good I swear....

Ok, vent over!

Hope everyone had a happy 4th of July. Ours was like a normal day and we watched fireworks in the neighborhood since our neighbors had some nice ones. It was a nice cool night too. Perfect for fireworks.

We also adopted a cutie yesterday, an abandoned (by his momma) baby raccoon. Meet Rascal!

    He's so sweet and cute! My dh has had one or two before and knows a lot about them and we did TONS of research (including making sure it was legal to have him in Florida, it is! whew!) and found out things dh didn't know before. But he is like a newborn. He sleeps, cries when he's hungry and gets fed with a bottle and poops and pee's. No diapers though. He's very sweet and has one eye open and working on the other.

Anyway, I think I've gotten everything out of my system for now. I may blog again before transfer, but no promises. We'll see.